Realise that I can still blog, as Hubby can understand my feelings from here. Here is only the place for me to put my feelings and not for others to read and judge my feelings, friends and close one.

Yesterday, have a scary night. Didn't sleep cause of the headach, trying to play audition to waive off the feelings. It did not go, going to sleep after this entry. Now I'm scare of everyday, I hope my everyday don't come. I don't want to be nearer to the day, I don't want to see the future. The future is so ugly, I hate future. I don't want to foresee and realise. I want to be blind forever, I want to be ignorant.

I'm afraid to live on, i afraid of everything now. You can scold me a scardy cat, but I'm really scare of tomorrow. Don't teach me how to live on, as I dun want to face tomorrow. Future is a horrible creature. I hate you.